Empathy

Before I get into Pink at all, I have to tell the Empathy group what an AMAZE BALLS job they did. Your art making activity and the connections it made to Empathy and really FEELING for both people we paired up with, through either their story or by adding music to the interpretation of their story, was so creative and meaningful. Mad props go out to all of you!

We have all heard of Sympathy and Empathy, but those two words are often mistakenly used interchangeably. As Pink says, Sympathy is NOT Empathy. Sympathy is when you feel bad FOR someone. When a friend's relative dies, and you feel bad FOR them, you are being sympathetic. To be empathetic, you must put yourself in their position and feel what they feel. As we discussed in class on Friday, as teachers we have had many moments when we feel empathy for our students. One of my most recent moments happened when a fourth grade boy came by during his lunch recess, and because this student is not one of my regulars who come by for more work time, I knew it was for another reason. It turns out, he really needed to get somethings off of his chest, so I sat and listened to him tell me all about his new living situation at home. His mom had started dating a new guy, who is not a good influence on her. Now she drinks and smokes a lot and is almost never home. He told me he doesn't like it when his mom is like that, so when she's not home, he hides her cigarettes and alcohol, hoping she won't find them. While listening to him tell his story, I thought about a period a few years ago when my own mom had a bad drinking problem. Hers wasn't brought on because of the influence of anybody else and she's never been a smoker, but I still saw her in a really bad place. She was someone who was not herself when she was drinking 5 or 6 martinis or even more rum and diets every night. In addition to feeling those same emotions of sadness with him, I also felt really proud of him for even attempting to stop his mom by hiding her cigarettes and booze.

As teachers, we have to be able to relate to our students in order to really teach them, and that comes from being empathetic. In this chapter, Pink quotes one of the most brilliant people on the planet, Oprah, and she said:

Leadership is about empathy. It is about having the ability to relate to and connect with people for the purpose of inspiring and empowering their lives.

We are the leaders in the classroom, so along with being Designers of quality curriculum, Storytellers, and Symphonic connection-makers, being Empathetic is our job.